Letter to my first Love, Hip-Hop

Dear....well hell you know ya name..,
I con-f-e- double s... no need for comparing cuz to me you are the best....as the beats drowns out the troubles of the day, the elegant simplicity of lyrics competing with bass that unites my soul to the present...yea this is you....you see nowadays you not respected only neglected cuz none yearn to learn....the ins and outs...but i do mean ins...gettin lost in the state of ind that I';m in....which is you...sigh...damn, remember that date i took you on???....when we conversed in an undertone of desire...not for the words we could conjure....i care more about what you speaking to me rather than the phat ass clappin which has been associated with you....for that I apologize...i know some don't dream but fuck it I wanna make love yo you....never proud to beg and plea....I want you to lay on my chest and caress my ears....little do you know the sanity you hold for me....yes I've lost more than I would like but you got the rest so ill be aite...lemme go before I start to ramble...I just wanted you to know I reminiscence on what we used to do.....

Signed,....The Fan who listens

G.O.O.D Music Blog: G.O.O.D Friday: Child Rebel Soldier- "Dont Stop"

G.O.O.D Music Blog: G.O.O.D Friday: Child Rebel Soldier- "Dont Stop": "Download: Child Rebel Soldier- 'Dont Stop'"

Bilal _Home from The Wiz...CLASSIC NEO-SOUL SONG

Talib Kweli - Take It Back <---UNRELEASED CLASSIC!!!!

A Love Letter

Dear Love...
Why is this so hard....I wish you could tell her how deeply I care for her...how my lonely nights become enslaved with the thoughts of her....never sexually...or should I say rarely...Because Love, you and I both know....what happens to the opportunist....I want you to tell her how her smile makes me smile...how he never existed in my eyes because I was so focused on her....I want to but I cant....Im not sure why....this is a mystery to us both...I mean between me and you....because I know you are wondering why in the world would I ask a stranger to deliver a message so sacred....I often wonder the exact same thing......mystery that I cannot solve.....not that I would want to, but I try so hard to do so....paradox I know...but thats the thing.....thats why I cant tell her....the beautiful complex equations that is her essence allows me to want to avoid finding the answer, but why do you ask? What do you do when you are finished with a math problem.....exactly, move on to the next one.....so I want her to know I wanna keep and study her like the world's hardest physics equation....not because shes so hard to figure out but because I AM A NERD....love this is why....this is not based on the physicality of her being, but rather the Einstein aura that embodies her....she understands me....more than any other.....so much so that I sometimes envy her, I rarely understand myself....its funny how I never knew you....but now I cant keep your name off my lips....love that is....love her

Yours truly, Recovering Undercover Lover

Sometimes...d-_-b

Sometimes I tossed and turn at night unable to swim in my thought which are flooded...kinda like you...yea you know that Aquafina flow...kinda strange right? but sometimes I just want a porn star...you know the type, licking and sucking without a second thought in matter...then...sometimes I want the librarian type that will get shy at the thought of doing something freaky....you know the type...so much so that she has to slip me a note in my lunch because she does not want the words to escape her perfect lips....you know the kind....as she walks in a room smelling better than a plate of yams with extra syrup...cuz she already know we southern gentlemen like...so in tuned with my needs....yea that's right we share the same station....sometimes I like to be random....just because ya know...light a match just to see the flame start...and end...on the tip of my tongue....but that called passion...sometimes, ya dig....yea I might be that dude who cuddles his pillow wishing it was "her" on the other side....sometimes I use "her" because I hate the term,"better half" although I do understand the concept...I was incomplete until I found you....yea that's sweet...but I do not want to think of myself as a half of anything, but rather that I have yet to reach my full potential, sometimes....but that's only sometimes you see....because other times....I am cocky...considering the meaning of the word...cock-y...erecting myself so that you can see and take note of what of real man looks like, not feel because I don't wanna be bothered sometimes....and I can be the most beautiful person...simply catering, pleasing, and satisfying every need you have....then sometimes...I just wanna curse...not at you, never that...but at this world because they have no clue how hard it is being a black man....sometimes...but I understand how hard it is for you....my black queen...I hope a get a chance for my crown...sometimes

Something about me (random)

I guess I am going to tell you....well you see I would love to take you out....not to a club nor a party...but to a nice restaurant or a cozy bookstore. And no I am not ashamed to say that sometimes I just want to cry, simply because I do not know what else to say.
But this is just something about me.
Yes I considered myself to be quite sensitive but you see that is the very place where I find my strength. Imagine the capacity and humbling levels of my "nice-ness" but this is only because I have seen true horrors that you could only fathom.
But this is just something about me.
You may say that I am too complex or too hard to understand...but sometimes I would rather not be understood, simply because I want an audience. Sometimes I want people to gather around me as I make prophetic predictions on the world that may never come true...simply because I do not want them too, not because they are not possible or are bound by some law or higher power....but because I change my mind.
But this is just something about me.
Yes I will admit I live in my own world but here, there are no confusing politics or contradicting laws...and I can say, "I don't have a cheese" when I really mean I do not have a process....you know Kraft single, cheese that is processed...
THIS IS MY WORLD and yes I am weird
But this is just something about me....but despite all of this she is intrigued by me, the very essence of her being invites me to learn more about myself if that makes sense....but it really does not because she can make 2 + 2 = 6 and I would teach it too my children like a new doctrine...she is my god....not that I worship her...but that I wont mind giving her part of my check....I wont mind bearing her cross....in my mind and heart, knowing that's where she will always stay. YES you could say that I am hopeless, hopelessly in love with the idea of loving her, love that is, as I lay her down at night remove her heels and undress her just to massage her in and out, yea that's right....making love to Love, and she feels so good...as we play the game of her, catching all that I throw and returning the velocity...hmm I wonder if I throw a curve....result HOMERUN.....as she whispers in my ear....Damn, there's just something about you.

Jazz Musician Sergio Mendez feat John Legend, Please Baby Don't

Music For Life, Hi-tek is a genius

Poem I found called "Untitled"

Fresh off the boat, unpolluted,
You can smoke it, snort it, or shoot it
It really don't matter how you do it.
Black Love is an uncommon high.
So good it brings tears to your eyes
Black Love will make you love yourself
Black Love will make you love something else,
Black Love will make you want to be free,
Black Love will make you want unity.
You see, Black Love is not a commodity, it's a feeling
and it's love for my people I'm dealing,
Yes, I'm getting high off my off stash,
But I don't have to worry cause Black Love
multiples very fast,
I fertilize it by not forgetting the past,
I cultivate it by making awareness my task,
I harvest it will real concern for my people and
less concern for their cash.
then its off to the factory to be packaged and wrapped,
mass distribution to the hood, a whole truckload of sacks,
I'm high rolling and big balling,
In Black Love I've found a higher calling,
My goal is Black Love in every mouth,
Every mind, every child, and every house,
It's not free but no one has to do without,
West Coast, East Coast, and the Dirty South,
Black Love is the best high there will ever be,
And if you in my presence you can always get some from me,
So put down your guns, pipes, hatreds, colors, and thugs,
Stick a hand out and get a hold of some of this Black Love.

Just Thinking again...

"I was rollin' around, in my mind it occurred
What if God was a her?....Wouldn't be ashamed to give her part of my check
Wearin' her cross, I mean the heart on my neck"- Faithful by Common

This song really got me thinking....what if everything we thought was true, turned out to be false. I'm talking in all aspects of life...food, religion, colors, sounds...just the life "experience" as a whole....I always question the "what ifs" in life for some reason.....what if everything we perceived as red is really blue and vice versa....and why is it that when we try new foods we always say " It tastes just like chicken" maybe its because that particular food taste like everything except chicken....how do we know what chicken tastes like anyway....we were only told what a chicken looks, tastes and sounds like but do we really know...hmmm and I just so happen to love chicken very much lol....just a thought

Just Thinkin about C.R.E.A.M

Just thinking about how we as men, define ourselves based on different statuses. They are all tend to vary depending on age; job title, level of respect in a particular field, etc. In essence, we all base our worth on a system that is already pre-existing which means that we define ourselves from another point of view other than or own. What is the most common factor in all of these? I believe it to be money. But why is it that we focus so much on material things and such, in a time where globally our dollar is steadily decreasing in value. So the main question is how can we define ourselves with a status that decreases with time, therefore in effect we decline also. Just remember that money is not everything. I am slowly but surely learning that the hard way.

Simple Ponderings on Religion and Philosophy

Some of these are not my quotes...just my thoughts......

What is the difference between a philosophy and a religion?

-Religions are based on the existence of a deity or deities. There can be philosophies associated with religion, but a religion is not a precondition to the existence of associated with religion, but a religion is not a precondition to the existence of philosophy. Many people classify Confucianism and some branches of Buddhism as philosophies, not religious as the existence of a deity is not an essential part of the beliefs.
-Philosophy is the pursuit of wisdom, a search for a general understanding of values and reality. Religion is a commitment of devotion to religious faith or observance, a personal set or institutionalized system of religious attitudes, beliefs, and practices
-One is a way of understanding why and the other is a way of controlling why.
-Religion is stable, while philosophy changing. Religion there is only one answer and it is right, no matter what the facts say or anything else for that matter.

Both Philosophy and Religion are based on 5 common assumptions about the universe.
-1)The universe has reason, meaning it is not futile to attempt to understand it
-2)The universe is contingent, meaning the current state of anything has been affected by other things.
-3)The mind that of the universe, can understand the universe.
-4)There is truth.
-5)There is predictability to the universe, meaning we can understand

Although there are some exceptions that utilize some conflicts of reasons to justify themselves, it can be said that these assumptions which have yet to be proven by any system are required to begin to answer questions we have about the universe, and have also thus far proven to be effective. The difference between philosophy utilizes experimentation to understand and to explain, not the what, but the why. Religion seeks not to explain the why, but the how. Meaning, religion provides a why, but that why is merely a step to the how,usually a god. Philosophy begins at the bottom, religion at the top.

Just as there is no sharp boundary line between philosophy and science, the same is with philosophy and religious doctrine. They can blur into each other in some cases. However, the crucial difference is that philosophers seek rationally-defensible knowledge, hard though this is to obtain. This means that they will not blindly accept claims that are made in so-called holy books, or transmitted within the traditions of a religious institution such as the Catholic Church, or granted by an alleged divine revolution. Even philosophers who accept some or all, of these as reliable sources for certain (alleged) truths will want to find some sort of rational argument as to why they should be accepted. When we talk about "a" philosophy, as opposed to just "philosophy", we usually mean some kind of comprehensive worldviews that claims to be supported by reason. By contrast, a religion will include a worldview that is typically supported by faith and authority, more than by reason, and will usually explain the world, and how it works, by invoking some kind of supernatural entity or principle.

Just a Quote

"They told me pain only shows you where you goin
You get to laugh then that shows you where you been
And when you get the cash that only shows you how to sin like when you gettin fast money and you blow it in the wind"- Joseph Guillermo Jones II

A philosophy to be

Oh to be a philosophy
Countless hours spent on your theories and rhetoric
Naive humans attempting to understand the intricacies of me
entire rooms full of questions with not enough answers
I am a mystery of myself
Knowing the I will never be understood I smile
Because i have no hope for others to understand
Thus scarcely understanding myself, how
can I expect the near impossible.
So I sit on a shelf in the mind of a young man
waiting to be discovered,
well actually I think I just was......

Untitled

kinda felt like writing please do not ask what was my inspiration because I really do not know, this was quite random...that might be the title....well anyway here it is

First time
thoughts flood like her waters
Katrina that is
understanding her, is my purpose
Life yea you know her
Beautiful, divine, subliminal teaching of physicalities
Which begs the question
How can I feel what I cannot see
Well, I know that I know, I know what I feel is you.
Moments feel like pure nothingness basking in your glory
Because time has no value that is
Which questions the fact of whether I am here or not.
Do you exist ? Are you real?
Hell if this is a dream
ultra-violet colors could never exemplify how I feel
robust pinks, neon purples, yellows brighter than the sun
And yet I am a blue moon
rare ; full
Yes blue because I know , I know
I cannot share this experience with the world
Put it in a bottle, slang it like crack
shoot it up myself and grow wings....
How I wish I could give life

J.A.D. (this is her title not mines)

This is a poem by a very perceptive female...she knows me a lil bit
Shout out to Danielle good look on this, I think you found your muse.

he says he's through thinking terminally
doesn't have any kids but he contemplate things generationally

said he knows he has swag
but he'd rather you notice his integrity


he don't really boast or brag
that he got theories they don't even teach in philosophy class


sometimes he feels like he's on another planet
but he ain't even a martian..
he just tryna find the best way to be a good man
he stay saying this life thing should have some kinda written up plan


but it don't
and even though these struggles sometimes hit like torpedoes
his hope don't stop..it just won't


so he go...out the door..for another day
his feet above ground...so it's gonna be a good day


talks about how he isn't looking for just a gal
he's a hopeless romantic in search of a soulmate


and even though he know the latest lyrics to drake, wayne, and T.I.
he'd rather listen to the stuff that makes the soul cry


he go to new heights with janelle cuz she tell him to smile
lyrics by legend making him feel like a motherless child
and then when he's at his wits end..it's bilal...


but like common...he just gone be
loving the sweet potato pie his momma make that taste so good
it ought not to be free


and he gone tell me again
they know my name
but they don't know nothing about me

♥dmarie

Sweetness is my weakness I don't give a shit

Simply Thinking....

(Sigh) yea its been one of those days....nothing major happened, it just amazes me sometimes how vain and judgmental people can be. How is it that "family" can treat you a different way simply based on aesthetics...wow...it saddens me that those we call our crutch or depend on, are so shaky in the simple act of treating you the same way. Consistency is the key, now I know one may say how can you expect from people what you yourself do not adhere to....well if that makes me a hypocrite....so be it....I AM COMPLEX....I do things, for no other reason than just because I felt like it. Better yet because I can, expressing myself in a world whom does not understand me....conversing with "friends" with nothing to talk about because inside I do not understand myself sometimes...I am not even ashamed to say that occasionally I do not know why I do certain things, or why words seem to be the only confusion in my life but yet its the only means of communication. Simply because of interpretation...how one perceives, period. The world is not black and white...the hue is gray in different contrasts, why you say?? I actually have no clue, but is that not the most beautiful part...to be so in charge...that we give our power of choice to another. Hmmm.....interesting....I guess that's what love is...maybe...maybe not....but will one ever truly know. A man that knows something, knows that he knows nothing at all only what he has learned from someone else. From our birth we have all been "programmed" to perceive the world in a certain light....even the simple act of learning our colors, shapes, and objects...we could never look at a tree as a baby and automatically know what it is, without of course someone telling the story of what it is who point and stare at. (Pointing at life) now I wish someone could tell me what this is...someone tell me....difficult huh?

No purpose really....just simply thinking....

Smile, though your heart is aching, smile,
Even though it's breaking
When there are clouds, in the sky you'll get by
If you smile, through all fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You'll find the sun come shining through for you
Light up your face, with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness

_Janelle Monae_

This is a beautiful song by a very underrated neo-soul artist. Just remember whatever you are going through life only gets what you give.

Time are Tough

Have you ever heard of the saying, that when it rains it pours?? Well, this is being proven time and time again. But I have no regrets...I'm starting to realize that rain does not mean that you drown...it only signifies your growth. So let me grow. All I need now is a little bit of sunshine (looking up)....waiting....

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/jaydeals

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/jaydeals

Dear John-From Gerry

Dear John,

She's lost I can tell because her tears drip like sweet caramel from a sundae. No I do not know the reason but I feel the pain she buried her face in my chest
she grins as the hairs tickle the inside of her nose. You see I will always be here.
Remember when she scraped her knee and she used my arm as her tissue
yea, i know gross but the point is YOU WERE NOT THERE, i was....
And I didn't mind, I was the first to see her smile again, after
YOU bastard, simple motherfucker for lack of better words. I really don't mean to be rude
but your actions toward my queen angers me so...
Just try to understand that one day I was where she is only trapped not by decision but by choice. I waited to be picked up and bought into a life to relieve discomfort. THIS IS MY JOB, its what I do. So back the hell up Before me and my boys get you. Think about it, getting your ass kicked by a stuffed bear. Sad...Right??? You still fail to comprehend that I will be here filled with all of your ex girl's hopes, dreams, secrets, lies, and confessions because I am the only one who pays attention-As she consistently says-
So in conclusion, stay the fuck away from her
-I'm her man now- also quoted by her ;)

Yours Truly, Gerry the Bear

The Poet

I just saw the best Poetry Lounge session EVER!!!! Shihan and a few of my fellow poets graced the mic....two words....TRULY INSPIRATIONAL

Feeling good right about now...I'm thinking about putting more effort and energy into progressing my skills and furthering my craft...let's see how far I can push this.

M.N.H. you are in my thoughts and prayers

Life is so fragile, one minute you are visualizing your success as well as your next moves tryin to stay ahead...One may question why me, but the questio

A BEAUtiful day

You ever had one of those days where nothing extravagant of profound happpens but you just feel as though all is right with the world?? It amazes me sometimes, how life can be so simply complicated yet feels as if you are one with everything around you....I'm starting to realize and completely understand that happiness is not an emotion....it is in essence, a life choice. Once you get to the harmonius decision to unselfishly make the world a better place, by one random act of kindness at a time. With this, I can build my own utopia.

I was married to a state of mind, now I'm divorcing...

Goodmorning....I'm awake...I think

Goodmorning pain, goodmorning misery Hello to my heart that lies in pieces...



Good day hopes, and dreams that lie in ruins



Goodmorning heartache, might as well get use to you being around. Heartache I love you , but i

hate what you do.

You twist and turn my thoughts into equations that I cant solve because I the lack the


variable...trust.

I hate that you are designed to conquer my mind body and soul.

Though at the sametime, this is the exact reason why I adore you.

These unanswered problems of multiplying satisfaction,


subtracting self-hate,


and adding +compassionandunderstanding+

only to equal= this.....thing.....at my answer, I stare and circle with discontent. :-/

My mind wanders while my eyes analyze the work on page, down to the answer and back up

again.

Finally I have realized the meaning of such a word.

No longer am I troubled at the thought of my heart in pieces, I believe this will never happen.

So therefore instead of goodmorning pain, good morning heartache....tired....stressed.....

Goodnite misery, goodnite misunderstanding your work here is done.

Its time for my best employee, for no longer will I run.

I will greet with much sincerity, Good Morning Love,

I mean....Goodmorning life because love has decieved me once again....man life baby I'm telling you i thought love was "the one" but her jealousy is too much for me and she is so stagnant confiding herself into exactly what everyone else wants her to be....why wont she stand up for herself and tell them that the world does not define her, as beautiful as she is, she defines the world....I thought i knew her once but how can one know love, if she is constantly changing to fit into the guidelines of those who are seeking her based on faith and nothing else?? Life that is the reason why i left her...the present is a gift I just wanna be